Aaron Gillespie

FACT: This is the First Update Done from the New Computer…

> UPS and FedEx are my New Best Friends… They Delivered Me Something that’s Quite Awesome. This Photo is Proof. I’m Going to Run Through Here a Few Features of it I’ve Already Found and Found Useful…. The Following Will All be About My Feelings and Findings with this New Puppy- So if You are Easily “I Don’t Give a Rat’s” About Things of that Nature, You can Just Skip Ahead Now Past It….

-Everything I’ve Plugged into it Has Installed itself Just like It Should; My New Mouse, My Jump Drive, My Still Camera…

-Still Having Trouble Getting the Video Camera to Work…

-My Video Game works on It… So That’s Wicked Awesome.

-Voice Recognition, I Could Write This Column Without Touching the Computer.

-Webcam Action for My Messenger Stuff and Anything else I Can Think Of.

-Immediate Internet Connection with the Network We have here at the House.

-How Much Better Everything is On Here- Just Navigation is Already Way Easier.

-Sadly- How Few Programs I Have that I’m Used Too… I have all of my files that I want on here already…. But I Don’t Have the Programs I’m Used to Just Yet.

-The Speakers are Surprisingly Good…. Most Laptop Speakers Suck.

-I Could go on Forever with Just a Bunch of Little Things… But I’ll Move On. There’s a Lot More Column to be Made.

> I’m Watching “Survivorman” on Discovery Channel. I Feel Like Such the Adult Now. I Have My own Briefcase and I Watch the Discover Channel Instead of Cartoon Network.

> There’s the Good News for Me as of Right Now.

> Christine… My Fair Maiden… has Gone to Europe, I Think She’s in France This Instant, Which Would be Great if I Didn’t Want to Talk to Her, But That’s Not the Case. I Haven’t Gotten to Speak with Her in the Past 3 Days, and There’s a Good Chance that that Trend will Continue All the Way Up Until the 28th… Pretty much Two Weeks. In the Meantime- I’ll Continue Putting the Last Two Letters in the Word “Lonesome.”

> I Stole Another Shirt Idea from the Fellows at the Lonely Island… Here’s the First Example of That- and Here’s the Most Recent One.

> Now that I Have All of this Technology, I Want to Camping> The Column has a Gotten Extremely Personal Lately. That’s Not Necessarily a BAD thing- But If I’m Hoping to Open this Up to Anybody to Read, I Should Probably Write More Things that Everybody can Enjoy Like This.

> How About that Airline Food… or the Lines at the DMV…. Uh………

> I’m Going to Go so I Can Work on the Scavenger Hunt Some… I Need to Finish Stuff Up on That. July 21st. That’s Official.

Top 5: Things I Still want to Do with this Computer…
5. Another Gig of Ram
4. TV Tuner
3. External Harddrive
2. Uh…… I Need an S-Video Cable… I guess
1. Maybe a Cooling Mat or Something….. I’m Pretty Good with what I have.

Quotes:

” We Need Something to Do with Jello… Because that Stuff is Cool. My Stuff is Getting Dumber and Dumber ”
- Jon Sliter, Helping with Ideas for the Scavenger Hunt –

” That Gnome is a Faggot, I want to Kick His Ass. ”
- Anon. -

Fact: I Updated Yesterday, Too

>  So, I Made My First Venture into the Table Waiting Area of Pizza Hut Today. It was Okay. I Don’t Know. Making Double What I Usually Make was Pretty Cool. I Just Don’t Like the Added Pressure. I Don’t Know.

> You Know what’s Crazy. The Cliché of “Possessions Can’t Make You Happy” is Completely True. Life is Exactly what You Make It- No Better, No Worse. I’ve Pretty Much Got (or am getting) Everything in the World I could Ever Need/Want, but It’s Crazy how Things can Turn Out Bad in the Best of Situations. I’m Missing Somebody. The Days have Grown Especially Long Since I’ve Known She was Leaving. I Feel Like I Should Have Hair Covering One of My Eyes and Playing Shows by the Name of “Slit My Throat because I’m without You” or the more Recognizable “Stabby Rip Stab Stab.” I’ve Just Kind of had a Funky Day, the Kind of Day that I Probably Could have Made a Great One- Had I just Approached it with a Different Attitude. I Couldn’t Quite Accomplish that for Some Reason. I Should be Happy, but I’m Not. I Think I’m Going to Go Play a Game of Pool to Get My Head Before I Continue with this Update….

> I Just Found Out One of My Speakers wasn’t plugged in Correctly and Wasn’t Functioning. So NOW I’m Going to Play Pool.

> Things are Slightly More Straightened Out. I’m Not Wallowing in Unneeded Self-Pity Anymore. I’m Ready for the 28^th. Also- I’m Ready for My Laptop and Gear- that Will at Least Take My Mind Off of Nothing.

> I want Ice Cream.

> I Really Want Ice Cream.

> This is Why I Like the Lonely Island… Even after they Get all Famous they Still Make Things Like This. (warning… written explicit content ahead – so If you are blind and/or illiterate and easily offended don’t click on that link… but if you are either of the first two, why are you on this site?)

> It’s Getting Late. I Don’t Have a Reason to Stay Up Anymore I Guess. This Whole Thing is Really Weird. I Don’t Like It.

Top 5: Reasons You Suck

5. You’re Reading a Column That’s Not Funny
4. You’re Reading a Column at All.

3. You are Reading the Top Five
2. You are Reading

1. You aren’t Me.

Quotes:

” Let’s See You Pull Another One Like that Out of Your Ass “
- My Dad, While We Were Playing Pool -

Fact: Yesterday I got $1225ish Spent on Me (I have to pay about half of it back, though)

> First Off Let Me Start by Saying I’m Ashamed at My Lack of Luster for Updating Lately. I Will Try My Best in the Near Future to Do at LEAST One Update a Week. It’s a Damn Shame Having Your Own Website and Not Fully Utilizing the Poopie Out of It.

> Christine is Going to Europe Because She’s Got Angel’s Vocals here in a Day or So. She’s Going to be Gone for a Long Time. I’m Already Preparing Myself Mentally for a Lack of Her. It’s going to be Gay. 20 Days and Counting.

> I’m Officially a Pizza Hut Pizza Engineer. So, That Makes Me Cool I Guess.  I Get Paid 6 Bucks an Hour. Which was Cool Until I Found Out What My Dad Made an Hour and Realized How Pathetic My Wages Were. I Guess that’s What You Get When You’re a Teenager.

> In 2-3 Weeks I’ll Become One Happy Guy. You are Probably Wondering about the Fact of the Update. Well That’s Because Last Night I Just Ordered the “Make College Life a Bit Easier Kit.” At Least That’s What I’m going to Call It Until I Think of a Different Name for It (It will be named… Just as Man Car, a.k.a. Brutus, has been) The Top 5 has Been Designated for this Topic… It has Links to Everything.

> I Just Did 35 Push-ups to Get My Mind Off of How Lazy I’ve Been Lately. I Realize 35 Pushups is Nowhere Near a Workout- So I’ll Probably Do More Here in a While.

> I Just Read About HD-DVD Vs. Blu-Ray Disks. It was Interesting. Blu-Ray has Better Capacities and What-Not. They Were Talking About a Development of a Superdisk that Could Play on Either System. That Would Be Nice. I Don’t Have Either, So, Yeah.

> Also I’m Looking at the Hitman Movie that’s Coming Out Sometime Supposedly before Next Year. They Have the Guy from Deadwood Playing 47. Here’s a Picture…. I’m Skeptical of his Ability to Play 47. They Still Should Have Went with David Bateson. Much Better. But that’s Just Because I’m a Hardcore Nerd.

> I Got a Few More Nutsnack Songs from Nick’s Album of Theirs. It’s Hardcore.

 Top 5: Good Deals on My Shizznizz

 

5. 40 Bucks for a Good Travel Mouse

4. 70 Dollars for a Hard Case

3. A 160 GB Ext. Hard Drive for Only 60 Smackeroo’s

2.  The Perfect Laptop for 780 Stripper’s Toilet Papers’s

1.  2 Gig Jump Drive for a Measly 30 Doll Hairs

 

 

 

 Quotes:

 

” Hardcore Cuddling ”

            - Nick Garrett -