Aaron Gillespie

Column is…. GO:

So I’m writing this column at 4:12 in the morning (otherwise known as middle of the night). I have my first class in literally 28 hours. I have to be at class at 8 AM every day this semester, which means I have to get up probably closer to 6:30. I’ve spent the past two nights up until ludicrous hours in order to better bond with the people on my floor. Seventh floor, McCollum hall. Already getting around, even to other residence halls, that 7^th McCollum is a good place to be. I don’t have a lot to say in this column… but I do have a few inspirations for a wicked awesome “numbers” category, so we’ll screw over the Top 5: for this update in exchange for a much more prevalent The Numbers section.

Before I get to that, I’d just like to say thank you to everybody. All my friends and family who have been there for me in the past. Especially in the past month and a half… Although nothing can replace her, you guys have really helped keep me afloat. Besides, this whole thing was never about replacing her. She never needed replaced. It was about Aaron finding out what Aaron likes to do and becoming who Aaron wants to become. So that I will be able to be the man that I want to be. I don’t want to replace her. I want her back, still, yes- but I realize that (as of right now) that isn’t possible. Maybe down the road a ways we could be together and I could still be the man that I want to be, maybe not. Either way, I’m going to live a happy life and I’m going to keep my friends and family close to my heart where they deserve to be.

The Numbers (College Edition):

25- Gallons of Apple Juice that the 7^th floor went through tonight (Playing Apple Juice-Pong and challenging the manliest of the men to chugging contests)

61- Dollars the Apple Juice cost

2 – Guys I’ve gotten to know that are as tall as me

5 – Guys I’ve seen that are as tall (or taller) than me

Around 30 – New people I could match face-to-name with and now consider my friends

47 – Number of people in the 7^th floor lobby last night (we all stood up and introduced ourselves… in a non-gay fun sort of way. Spontaneously.)

4 – Number of places off-campus houses that I know of that are inhabited by my friends.

6 – Number of residence halls I’ve spent time in over the past week

3 – Number of residence halls I was in all of last year.

2 - Number of times I’ve played volleyball until I’ve sweat through my clothes in the last week

6’7”- Average height of my sand-beach volleyball team’s frontline today

4 - Number of Free T-Shirts I’ve gotten so far

Quotes:

“ Dude, do you play basketball? Cause you should really look into that. "
         - Boomie (I think that’s how it’s spelled) which is only quote-worthy because Boomie is 6’ 9” -

Column is…. GO:

For the first time ever today I went to the skatepark to alleviate some stress, depression, and what have you; and I came back from the skatepark more stressed, more depressed, and more what have youed. I mean, I went there to land one trick in particular. I did it yesterday on my 3^rd try… and I wanted to film myself doing it so I could have that. I get to the park and it’s crowded. Like… very. I do a little warming up (little) and I go ahead and turn my camera on in the corner of the park. I try and try and try to do the thing that came so easily last night… and I just can’t get it. 20 tries or so go by of me falling or failing. I have a limp. I have a sizable swelling in my left shin region. I am scraped up. I finally… FINALLY land my trick. I feel no joy. I go over to my camera. The tape had ended. Only a few minutes before I finally did what I wanted to do the tape ended.

I don’t understand how other people function. I figured out how I function a little better I suppose. I seek other people’s approval 99% of the time. I do what I want to do usually… but usually not for my own satisfaction. I don’t know why I want to be everybody’s favorite dude so much… I suppose another question is why do I fail so miserably at being everybody’s favorite dude. I was somebody’s favorite dude once. She’s gone now. It’s my fault that she’s gone. I mean. I understand that “it’s nobody’s fault. The situation was just too impossible for anybody to have been happy. Things were so serious and we weren’t ready for it.” I understand. I just can’t help but remember how great things were. I mean. It’s hard. It’s very very hard.

On the lighter side of things. I’ve moved in to my room. I’ve moved back onto campus. I love my room. It’s nice. There’s plenty of space for me to relax by myself, or to have people over to do whatever with. I would still like a Playstation 3. Considering the best thing I have to offer as far as that goes is “hey let’s go to my room and play Super Smash Bros… the original.” I’ve met some people I really like. I have met a few more people I really don’t like. All in all… I’ve had a better start than last time. But move-in day is tomorrow and that’s where the real fun begins. That was meant to be read in a sarcastic scared tone. I just need to listen to Weezer and keep on thinking “Aaron, you don’t suck. Nobody thinks you are as lame as you think you are. Aaron, you are just self-conscious about everything. Aaron, just be happy with yourself. Aaron, don’t worry about shit. Aaron, life is going to go on and you are going to be joyful again. You’ll find contentment.”

I can only fight those voices for so long.

That being said, I’ve had a good time so far believe it or not. Those few people I’ve met that I like, I really do like. I’ve had a few fun times for sure.

Faux Sure.

Bitch.

Top 5: Memories at KU so far…

5. Spitting down 10 flights of stairs, even though my looooogey was the only one that didn’t actually make it all the way down.

4. The game I learned today “Horse, Knight, Rider” and played with a cool dude against all the other HOT’s.

3. Skating alone at the skatepark… doing it just for myself. (the first night)

2. Running around Hashinger all night. (ALL night)

1. Trying to sneak out a mass horde of people out of the meeting without anybody noticing.

Quotes: (from HOT’s, I’ll leave their last names off for anonymity’s sake)

“ Knock! Knock!…. (who is it)… Not a rapist! "
         - Thomas, who was literally knocking on a door, not telling a joke -

“ I’d punch you right in your zombie cooter "
         - Brian -

Column is…. GO:

While it is fresh in my mind… I watched “American Psycho” last night. It was one of those movies that I instantly got into. My mind was trying to figure out all the craziness. I was trying to understand what was going on the whole time. Then the movie ended… I have no idea what the hell it was about. It was funny. It was scary. Most of all, it was strange. If you want to see something that will make you go “what the f***” I suggest watching American Psycho.

I think things are getting better. I think everything is going to be okay. I could write pages upon pages about my situation. My thoughts. I think I’m going to stop talking about them so much. I hate the fact that I tell everybody I know everything I think. Where’s the mystery? Where’s the charm? I need an inner circle of friends that I can talk to about anything and everything… but I’m tired of people I barely know knowing me.

Jon and I haven’t decided on a name for a website… We might be stuck like that forever. Nothing awesome has jumped up and smacked us in the face. Maybe we should just go with “jonandaaronsblogaboutcoolshit.com” Possibly “killerducky.com” I don’t really know.

Here’s the big important news: this will be my last update out of Lebo. I’m headed to Lawrence in 2 days. I get to move in before everybody else because I’m part of a special program which helps “orient people in the hysteria of move-in day.” Quite frankly, I’m most excited to just get moved in. I am excited to see how my room will be laid out. I’m excited to see where I’ll be living this year. The thing I’m most excited of all for is seeing who I’m living with this year. I don’t have a roommate because I want to be able to have anybody over at any time and not have to worry about shit.

Okay usually I throw some falsely important philosophical mumbo-jumbo in my updates… so I guess I should do that now-

I’ve started to take better care of myself. I have been breaking sweats everyday; be it through skateboarding or some other form of exercise… I’ve been doing it. Successfully. I like it. I bought a nice water bottle a week ago and I have been drinking water exclusively for the past week. I feel better. It feels good to take care of yourself. I suggest you trying it. Unless you are Jon or Josh Weltha… you two can stop.

Now on to a top 5 that is completely unrelated to anything I’ve just written about. (Parental Advisory Warning: This top five does contain the word “sex,” so if you are uncomfortable with the coming together of two people in the most sacred of ways- if the idea of two people doing something that is completely natural to all breeding creatures and has been for some reason become more of a touchy subject to Americans than murder, violence, theft, and disloyalty than please skip this top five and read my quote. It’s for you)

Top 5: Secrets I’ve uncovered about Cosmo magazine

5. Some form of the word “Sex” (sex, sexy, sexier, sexiest) is on the cover at a MINIMUM of 3 times for every issue.

4. There is always some form of  “lose 20 pounds by semester” type article with a bogus-ass idea for weight loss such as “Try standing on the subway instead of sitting.”

3. The sex tips that I’ve read in there are either really obvious, or completely ridiculous. If any girl ever actually tried to pull off half of that stupid stuff, I’m sure their guy would laugh hysterically. The rest of it is common sense.

2. The sections and tidbits they have in there to be funny are not funny more than 95% of the time. I’ve read funnier stuff in the bathroom stalls at the high school.

1. No article they’ve ever written has ever really had any profound meaning. (just like this top 5)

Quotes:

“Life in Lubbock, Texas, taught me two things: One is that God loves you and you’re going to burn in hell. The other is that sex is the most awful, filthy thing on earth and you should save it for someone you love. "
         - Butch Hancock -